Equally Yoked: What It Really Means While You’re Waiting

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I’m currently in a waiting season, yep, that one. The single, praying, celibate, trying not to sabotage my own heart season.

To be honest, it’s been about 4 years since I’ve been celibate. Back in 2021, I made a clear decision to cut off all the vague, half-hearted, compromising relationships in my life. I realized I wasn’t walking with Jesus the way I said I believed in Him. I was a Christian, yes, but my heart? It wasn’t fully surrendered.

A little background: I’ve been a Christian my whole life (super grateful my parents are Christian), but growing up, we went to a local church that was cessationist, so I never really knew much about the Holy Spirit. It wasn’t until I stepped into a charismatic church later on that I had my first real encounter with the Holy Spirit. That’s when my spiritual journey truly began, with all its ups and downs.

When I moved overseas, I attended different churches. Looking back now, I realize that during certain seasons, I was honestly just a lukewarm Christian (lol painful but true). I knew about God but didn’t always walk with Him. I didn’t realize I was drifting until the Holy Spirit gently opened my eyes.

Now? I’m enjoying my celibate season, just Jesus and me. And this morning, I had this strong conviction in my heart to open my Bible and study the meaning of being equally yoked. Because suddenly, it hit me:

Jesus was carrying an unequal yoke with me for years. 

Like… imagine how much it must’ve hurt His heart when I was rebelling, doing things totally outside His plan. He was still walking with me, still loving me, but I was pulling away. That image alone brought me to tears.

So I’m writing this as a reminder for myself (and maybe for you too) about why being equally yoked matters so much.

🐂 What Does “Equally Yoked” Mean?

“Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?”
— 2 Corinthians 6:14

This verse uses an old farming image. A yoke is a wooden tool that connects two animals, usually oxen, so they can walk side by side and pull a heavy load. But if the animals are different in strength or speed, they’ll struggle to move forward. One pulls ahead, the other lags. The burden becomes unbearable.

That’s what happens when we connect ourselves whether in friendships, dating, or marriage to someone who’s not spiritually aligned. Eventually, someone gets hurt. And usually, it’s the one who’s trying to walk with God.

💛 First, Be Yoked with Jesus

Before we even talk about human relationships, let’s talk about the main relationship that matters: yours with Jesus.


“Take my yoke upon you and learn from me… For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
— Matthew 11:29–30


Jesus invites us to walk beside Him, to trust Him, and to let Him carry the heavy stuff. And when we truly walk with Him, we start to understand our worth, our purpose, and what real love looks like.

And let me tell you: nothing compares to that kind of peace.

💍 When It Comes to a Future Husband…

Being equally yoked in a romantic relationship means more than just “he goes to church” or “he’s a good guy.” It means:

  • He has a genuine relationship with Jesus
  • He’s walking in the same spiritual direction
  • He leads with humility, not ego
  • He doesn’t just read the Word, he LIVES IT

Why does this matter?

Because if God calls husbands to be spiritual leaders, then I don’t want to be dragging someone or being dragged on the path God called us to walk together.

🕊️ While You’re Waiting…

Your single season isn’t a punishment. It’s not a pause button. It’s a purpose-filled chapter.

Use it to:

  • Grow closer to God
  • Heal and reflect
  • Learn to hear His voice more clearly
  • Build non-negotiables rooted in your identity in Christ

I used to think waiting was just… boring. But now I see that this is the season where God refines you, gives clarity, and reminds you that you’re never truly alone.

🙏 A Little Prayer

Let me end with this little prayer I prayed this morning. Maybe it resonates with your heart too:

Lord, thank You for opening my eyes. Thank You for never giving up on me, even when I was unequally yoked with You. I surrender my desires, my heart, and my future husband into Your hands. Help me stay yoked to You first because only then will I be able to recognize someone who’s also walking with You. Teach me to love this season, and remind me that Your timing is always perfect.
 
And Lord… wherever my future husband is right now, I lift him up to You. I don’t know what he’s going through, but You do. I pray that You protect him, guard his heart, and shape him into the leader You’ve called him to be. Keep his heart soft and close to Yours. Let him grow into a man who loves You more than anything. Let him be Your best boy, God. And when the time is right, align our paths in a way that only You can. Amen. 

If you’re in this season too, I just want to say: you’re not crazy for wanting more. You’re not weird for waiting. And you’re definitely not behind.


Let’s keep walking with Jesus. That’s the kind of yoke that leads to life! 💙

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